A Most Unreliable Narrator Issue #104 Pop vs Soda
If you’re from the Midwest, there is only one correct answer
Well, here it is, another Sunday.
I seem to have made it a habit of discussing the weather in my missives so today it is sunny and 66F. The windows are open. After my PBS date with Kristin earlier today, TEH, myself, and the dog went for a jaunt around the park. We didn’t go far as the dog is nearly 10 but it was enough to tire her out and enough for me to get some steps in. I wore shorts so my legs could get some sun.
(This is such a Midwest thing to do. Talking about the weather, I mean, at least it’s not windy.)
I’ve been on the couch reading ever since.
My paperwork for fat girl surgery has been faxed and I have it confirmed they have received it. My GP and shrink have also confirmed they have sent in their share. It won’t be looked at until this upcoming week at the earliest. My brother, whom I am now talking to nearly every day on his long commute to work, asked me how I felt about it, and this is a spin of my reply:
Dear friend and I had a conversation about this the other day. I told them that I was afraid that Norton will take one look at my paperwork and the letter from my shrink and decide that I’m not eligible for the surgery. Or they will look at my eating habits, which I had to chronicle for three days (easy peasy, I use LoseIt anyway), and say, “Well, she eats pretty good and works out three times a week, she doesn’t need surgery.” Dear friend asked their nutritionist about this for they had concerns and the nutritionist said it the fact that I eat fairly well, and exercise, made me an ideal candidate because it meant I was taking this seriously.
I hope that’s really true.
Nonetheless, I’ve adjusted my attitude to be that of getting rejected and working on my own plan which is to be strong and eat healthy (ironic considering this week’s Wonderful Thing but that’s an occasional treat!) and being able to move. If I’m not working out, I’m walking. Sitting on the couch after my walk today feels like I’m being lazy but there some days you just need to relax.
(I need to pick up my Italian and get back into meditation again.)
I’ve laid out a zillion times what I want my goals to be, and I’ve also added a new one:
I want to walk up, nay jog up, the Spanish Steps and not be out of breath.
I don’t remember how I felt when I was last in Rome in 2005 but I was 40lbs lighter and I stopped a lot on the way up to look at all the knock-off designer bags. (FUN FACT! The street that runs into the steps has a lot of couture shops (Fendi, Gucci, LV, Bvlgari, Burberry, etc.) so it seemed a titch hilarious I could buy a knockoff a few hundred feet from the original shop. The gall of the sellers, I tell you.)
I cannot believe it’s been 17 years since I was in Rome and 16 years since I was in Scotland. I haven’t traveled internationally since 2012. Starting with the cruise this year, that’s about to change.
My thought process is I will be rejected. I cannot get my hopes up for when I did with Baptist, I wailed like an old Italian woman on her way to a funeral. TEH was most concerned as he had never seen me that upset before. I just wanted something so badly that to be rejected from it broke my heart in a million pieces.
I do not know what my insurance requires for the surgery re: medically supervised weight loss. Dear friend is about three months of a supervised diet and founds out later this month how much more she needs, or not needs, to do. My insurance told me 10 or 26 visits. I have no idea what this means and said as much in my cover letter to Norton. I’ve been haphazard with tracking my food but two weeks ago I weighed myself and have been faithful in my tracking no matter how small it is as well as recording my weight. I have an appointment at the end of the month to get weighed by my doctor.
LoseIt puts me at 1900/day but I tend to hang out around 2100-2200. It’s still a deficit (I need 3200 a day to maintain) so I’ll lose but just not as fast. I’ve reprogrammed my foods for breakfast, lunch, and snacks with Factor meals being dinner. My goal is to lose one lb a week which puts me around 280 at the time of our trip. My shrink says I shouldn’t think this way but I cannot help it.
(This ties into the subject of “conditioned thinking” my therapist and I talked about this week so don’t be surprised if 104.5 drops this Wednesday.)
I’ve started purchasing items for our cruise already. I am trying out solid shampoo (this stuff is amazing btw), solid lotions, and putting travel TP on my list of things to buy. (It’s basically TP without the roll. Did you know in some public restrooms in EU countries, TP is not available unless you either bring it or buy it from a woman whose sole job is to sell you TP? Also, public restrooms can also cost a few Euro. I will not be denied!) I purchased a few anti-theft nylon cross-body bags to roll up in my messenger bag so I can carry my stuff when I’m out an about. Anti-theft means the bags are apparently unslashble and the hardware has a locking arrangement. Those should be here in the next few days for me to test drive.
(Since I haven’t traveled internationally in over a decade, if you have any tips or hacks (including rolling clothes up and stuffing items into shoes), comment on this post or drop a line. I’ll take anything.)
I’m also mentally sorting through my wardrobe, determined to turn 5 or whatever items into 20 outfits. We’ll have access to laundry on the cruise but there will be four days before and after the cruise with no access to laundry other than the sink. (TEH washed our laundry in Brussels during our honeymoon with travel Tide and his feet in the bathtub. Good times!) But I have no idea what I’ll weigh and no idea what I own so I’m trying to not get ahead of myself.
What can I say, I’m excited for everything.
P.S. We saw Everything Everywhere All at Once yesterday and it was super good. Bonkers, but good. I told Best Kate I was taking WLS seriously because I ordered a small popcorn and not a large bucket. She laughed but I wasn’t kidding. What is life without movie popcorn?
Things I Recently Wrote
What I’m Reading
FINISH A FUCKING BOOK LISA BEFORE STARTING A NEW ONE.
The 7/12 Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle An Agatha Christie-esque locked room mystery
Reputation Mean girls with Jane Austen thrown in
Dissolution Lawyer turned sleuth in Tudor England
The Historian A 700 page tomb of the retelling of Dracula
If We Were Villains Did he or did he not commit the murder?
The Book of Life All Souls book #3
To Love and to Loathe Two hearts battle it out. Who will win?
Marvellous Light A magical Edwardian England filled with love and conspiracies
Girls to the Front Oral history of Riot Grrrls
Again, Rachel Follow up to Rachel’s Holiday
Ten Steps to Nanette Hannah Gadsby’s memoir
all about love bell hook’s classic
Caffeine Free Coke.
I had been off the hard stuff (caffeine) for over three years when a few months back I wanted a dark pop and as we entered the Irish Rover, I ordered a Pepsi and sipped it like an alcoholic drink on the rocks, which sans alcohol, it surely was. I ordered two. Since then, every now and then I’ll drink a Coke (preferred) when we’re out to dinner (1-2x a week) or if I’m really feeling tired, I’ll head down to Jimmy John’s, located one floor below us, for they have a good fountain and the good ice. So that I don’t get crazy and start drinking Coke daily, I’ve started imbibing with Caffeine Free Coke. Not QUITE as a good as regular Coke but it does its job. I’ve found one local store in the area that sells it. I’m now a valued customer with a loyalty card and everything.
(Who know who else has good ice? Jimmy John’s and Raising Cain’s. Just in case you need to know.)
Get vaccinated! Vote in the primaries! Boop a dog’s nose!
P.P.S. I brought back lisarabey.com from the dead. It’s a static page of the stripped down basics with the ability to download my resume (stripped of contact information naturally). You just never know.